PROLOGUE
from the sacred Qu'ran of my faith:
We have made lawful to you your wives whom you have given their due compensation and those your right hand possesses from what Allah has returned to you [slaves and captives]... in order that there be upon you no difficulty. And ever is Allah Forgiving and Merciful.
Surah an-Nur 24:58
This is the story of a slave. A willful slave. A woman who believed in the right to choose whomsoever she willed to love, and to believe and act as she deemed best and true.
The human soul cannot be owned. Bought and sold as the body and mind may be, no man can own another man's soul, or tell a heart what to feel. Not even one's own. He can be a great lawmaker, 'Lord of all the land', call him 'King' or 'Sultan'... but... he cannot do that.
This is the story of a young woman who chose her fate with the conviction that on the day when souls are weighed and measured for their good and evil, she would not be able to attribute any of her sins to another master. She did what she thought was lawful, the only way that she could under the laws that existed at the time, and when you judge her (as you will), judge her knowing that she did so in a manner she felt she would be able to explain to her Creator, who she believes gives all men free will, and a soul with the purpose of living a life that is pleasing to God in equal parts, fullness and honesty.
Everyone is a slave to something. People of my nation have a false sense of freedom. They think freedom for me means driving a car in Saudi Arabia, and dressing up to please other people, wearing 'whatever I want' so long as it isn't a veil or a headscarf or loose fitting clothing. People are slaves to their jobs, slaves to media images, slaves to an idea of freedom-that if you choose other than that, you are suppressed.
I have left my country to have the freedom to live my life. If you believe freedom is being able to do what you want, I'm afraid to disappoint you, but no man is ever entirely free. In my country I had the freedom to change the law, to marry regardless my race, social position, religion, and family, and to choose to give that country in favor of another and still possess those same old freedoms upon returning. Here, I have the freedom to walk down the street-without everyone stopping and staring, no one needing the hours of my day for a life story dispelling their stereotypes. Here, I can get any job that I apply for based simply on my capabilities. Can I do the job? Yes. Do they need a person? Yes. So I've got it.
Now,mI might get paid by passport. Meaning, I make more money than someone of the same position and skill level from another country deemed lesser than my own by what I blame, some great social injustice, but I can get the job I deserve without having to fight for it. Yes, you can undoubtably argue, I could still get the same job back in the country of my passport cover with, albeit, a little effort on my part, but why should I have to prove myself based on anything, when another accomplishes the same, sans struggle, sans approval period? Is that not too, injustice?
The price of your high ideals, my father once told me. The only thing he and my mother agreed upon regarding the raising up of me was that the inclination of my temperament towards the fixed mark/mirage of 'fairness' would lead to trouble, and be the cause of great unhappiness and discontent in my life.
Life is not fair. I wish it were, but it isn't, so more often than not (and more often, I'll admit, than other people) I find myself fighting for something or fighting with someone; but I am torn no longer. It is immature to say that freedom is being able to do what you want, even if there is no harm in that for others. I know you can never gather up everything that you want and hold it all in one place. Go to every bounded border of the globe, and you will never find all of the freedoms you require in order to do everything that you want to do. If you are extraordinarily lucky, as I have been (you may laugh at this, it is your prerogative), than you may just find enough of those small but substantially integral freedoms, to do just what you need to do.
I needed to be with the one I loved, I needed to do so in good conscience, I needed to have a life of ordinary happinesses where I could support myself... I wanted to feel safe and happy and understood like every human being does, whose mind is not stricken with some depraved sickness...
I know the eventual expat audience will wonder: How could she be made a slave? In this modern day and age, who keeps a slave anyways? Only a tyrant would write such an indecent law that would drive men and women to even consider such an outmoded and barbaric practice as slavery is, even if the practice is partially condoned by-way-of-mention in 'some Muslim holy book'...
You can never gather up everything that you want and hold it all in one place. The best thing you can do is just find a place where most of your happiness exists, and try to live there.
For me, that place is Oman. Oman is a little Sultanate (that means, it is ruled by a Sultan) in the Persian Gulf. Most people have never heard of it, I find. It is not Amman, Jordan. Usually people just stare at me blankly until I say "it's close to Dubai." Most people, where I am from, think 'Dubai' is an actual country.
Oman is often called a Muslim country. I am a Muslim, so I know that means simply, that the population of citizens of said country is a majority, Muslim, and that a few of the principles of Shariah Law are enacted by the government there as a means of government. Once I was one of those so naive as to think an 'Islamic Country' would spell bliss. Now, I know there is no such thing as a 'Muslim Country' only a place with lots of Muslims. Neither is there such a thing as a 'Free Country'.
I left my country to have the freedom to live my ordinary life honestly in Oman, but have had to come to terms with the universal truth, that an honest life is not a freedom universally accessible to all. Human lives inevitably overlap in a dance of differing desires and imperatives, and some must sacrifice their personal freedoms for the sake of others.
Oman is a country ruled by a benevolent Sultan beloved by his people. Slavery is illegal in Oman, and has been since 1970 when an edict was passed by said Sultan freeing all slaves. Still, this story takes place in the Oman of today, and concerns the confused children of the Gulf as they deal with the complexities of a changing landscape revolving around nationalism, Islam, cultural familial obligations, and the eternal, and sometimes disturbing question of what freedom really is, and what it entails. It could easily be set in any other Gulf state, or even as far away from "The Girls of Riyadh" mindset as Australia. I have an Australian friend, who is actually quite famous via the blogging set, who can relate.
I am writing this because it is an important issue affecting my generation of Muslims, and because I love Oman as if I were Omani, and want to see the best for the Omani people. I admit to choosing the title and cover art to manipulate an Orientalist mindset into buying the book. I want the Western expat woman at the Saabco grocery in Qu'rum or Al Fair in Al Kuwair to be enticed by the veiled blue eyes of the woman on the cover, so that she chooses what began as a travel diary, over the Jean Sasoon "Princess" books in the stores' English-language section. My mother only having the movie "Not Without My Daughter" as a social reference for the region never benefitted me, or anybody else.
Everyone is a slave to something. As in the West, slavery as a state, is a result, not the actual issue in need of address. In Oman, personal freedom is often thought of as immature and non-descriptive. One's family comes first. Even the Sultan, who has the power to alter the course of his culture with the draft of a law and the revision of an edict, is a slave to his people. So maybe he can understand, better than anyone else, the reasonings of a willful slave.
I hope so-selfishly- and it is my very prayer. Pity, for all my philosophizing prologue, most of what you are about to read is most mundane to me, compared to the promise of intrigue and injustice conjured by the very first breaths of this story, when uttered by the syllable: 'slave'.
This story is about a slave. A willful slave. Emphasis being on the convictions of the woman, not her slavehood. Do I want pity for her? Not really. Do I personally condone the practice of slavery, that being the sale of human beings in exchange for money or goods? Of course not! But then, I do not think worldly goods is what Allah subhanhu wa ta'ala meant for us mere mortals in the provisions made for slavery in the Holy Qu'ran.
People in my country feel that freedom means being able to do what you want, or at least being able to vote for people who might be able to get you what you want. Some in the Middleeast agree, though I've never heard an Omani say he wasn't proud of his/her Sultan. Whether out of censorship or patriotism, this remains a fact. Like most Omanis, I disregard this view (or definition) of freedom as irrational, due to its frank implausibility for reasons aforementioned.
Muslims believe that God instilled in every human being the ability to choose good or evil, and called it free will.
It is my personal belief that freedom is the choice to do the right thing, nothing more, nothing less.
Sometimes it seems we have no choices and our paths are determined for us, and circumstance dictates where we are able to go.
I never wanted to come to Oman in the first place, and I had never intended to return when I left. When I bought my airline ticket five years later, for a return tour of the Gulf, my destination sure as hell wasn't Muscat, but that is where I ended up.
Muslims believe that God gave us free will, but that all our choices are preordained, with God knowing the outcome of those choices. If that is so (and I'm Muslim, so I believe it is) there had to be a reason He, subhanhu wa'ta'ala kept dragging me back here, to Oman, and to a certain Omani.
This started out as my travel diary, chronicling the adventures and misadventures of my friends and I for the amusement of our relations who begged us "make a book of it!". I require that is remain such (unless you personally want to undertake to task of editing my work free of charge) being that I am no great writer. The events themselves will make every intended point. One last point:
In my religion, there is no greater state to aspire to, that to be a slave to the will of Allah. I will never fully understand that will, but here in the following pages will be my best attempt to relate it.
Bismillahi Rahamnir Raheem...
So yeah, I couldn't help myself, I had to start a new section devoted to odd and (erred) Omani signage. This sign is first, because it reminds me of my Omani friends in general (when I first met them, and they never said anything bad about their country). LOL.
So I have decided to start writing a [FICTITIOUS!!!!!] short novel inspired by the online travel diaries of four ex-pat friends of mine, two Omani girls, a rather stereotypical group of Omani guys LOL, and some common themes we've all experienced [love, the Gulf culture, marriage, race, country Islam, freedom] and I've set it in Oman. I intend to post a third of the story online, the first few posts on this blog and the rest continued on a private-invite-only one, and if you like it, LOL, and want to find out what happens to my cast of zany and stereotypical characters, you'll have to wait and buy the book. 
My post about formal makeup in Oman: OMIGOD!!!! LOL. There are two kinds of formal makeup in Oman, the expat sort which doesn't even make it for daywear for the Arab women who are serious about makeup, and then there is the 5haleeji style. As a girl who just had her makeup done professionally the other day, I can go, um, well, it is different than what I am used to painting on myself. And I am not shy with the eyeshadow, I had thought.
For the khaleeji look, they are absolutely strong on the use of different colours, and their aim is to match the colours to your outfit, not what suits you best personally. I'm a girl who looks good in purple eyeshadows, but the other day I had FIVE different colours of GLITTER pasted out past my natural browline. Concealer was then used to give the shadow a severe shape. I felt like an old Egyptian movie star (THE SHAPE)/ 1920s flapper (THE THICKNESS OF THE UNDERLINING---THIS I LIKED BTW)/ circus trampeze artist (THE GLITTER). With all that colour girls, why the glitter?????
Another feature is re-drawing the shape of the brows, either by bleaching the brows, or actually taping over and repainting the entire natural brow. Not many Omani women I've met pluck since to do is generally thought of to be a sin in most instances (unless you've got a mustache).
The next feature is that there is usually two kinds of eyeliner on the bottom of the eye, the dark black one, and then a white line at the corner of the eye, to create drama and shape.
Fake eyelashes seem to be a must, and also, painting your skin on till it is so cake-thick white. LOL, I am soooooo glad I am already white as ghost, so I get to skip this step, or I'd end up with the worst conditioned skin. I am one of those who is too lazy to wash off lastnight's makeup. As a result, I have no white pillowcases.
This is pretty much (a tamer version) of what my makeup the other day looked like. It kinda made me feel like a cross between a Geisha and a drag Queen.
This reminds me of a friend's wedding photo, where all I could do was stare, horrifies by how UNFLATTERING the eyeliners and shadow was to her face shape.
This one, to me, is actually pretty, because of the shape of the kohl, ad the fact the model kept her natural skin tone apparent.
What do you think about this style of Omani makeup? I don't think it is TRULY the original cosmetic culture of Oman, but was adopted, like black abayas, when Omanis used to be in other countries like Saudi and Bahrain and Kuwait, back in the day.
(top two pics from Omani cultural festival in Australia).
Since what gets me the most hits is people googling Omani women's traditional clothing, I'll post some more shots for everyone:
I remember going to a Syrian friend's home and thinking, mashaAllah, what a beautiful home. Everything went with everything and was just sooooooo colourful without being tacky that I loved it.
Note, her walls and rooms weren't bare, despite the lack of living images (an Islamic concept) on the walls, and the prints and colours balanced against the traditional shapes of the furniture.
The odd accessories and light fixtures fascinated, and intrigued...
Everything smelt like bukhoor (inscense) ...
And even the cabinet had a detail, an ornament hanging from its hinge... a simple tassel.
Warmth. Who wouldn't want to wake up here?
The beaded fringe on the lamps....
To the curl of the dressing room.... MashaAllah what a beautiful home!
*First off, let me say, I KNOW covering of the face (every part of it but the eyes and their rims) is a valid part of the religion of Islam. It is not merely a "tribal" aspect of Omani culture as some Omanis (without a valid Islamic education) might tell you. But it is only recommended as better for a woman by a verse in the Holy Qu'ran, and it is not cumpulsory, as there are many examples narrated from the Prophet Mohammed SAW's time of women who did not have their faces covered; and the Prophet SAW himself did not forbid this practice so obviously is is halal (lawful) for the Muslim woman not to cover her face. But from an Islamic standpoint, veiling the face is a part of the religion (not an integral, important point, but a valid point). 
Has anyone noticed how there are four whole channels on Nilesat TV dedicated to showing pictures of camels? My roomie complains of how there are ten channels spouting men in thobes dancing with sticks and/or camel pics with some dude screaming Arabic poetry. But I like men in thobes dancing with sticks, LOL.
But I do not think this is so different than bad TV in my homeland. Back in my country we have a channel dedicated to a fire. 24 hour log burning on the fire. Every now and then you'd see an arm put a new log on the fire. And during Easter they had 24 hr bunny rabbits jumping on the grass, hopping about. Camels are more interesting than rabbits, in my humble, and wholly unpatriotic opinion.
Just a tip, it is traditional in most 5haleeji homes to keep a small collection of colognes and perfumes near the sink, for the discretion and use of the guest. Most homes have three or four bottles, an option for men, and an option for female guests. Having different kinds is important, as people have different tastes. Having at least one option with a spray, and one with an oil base, is the most appropriate.
I have been shopping around Muscat for the perfect wardrobe/armoire. Most of the nice ones are purchased in full bedroom sets I LIKE ranging from 720-1500 rials. Ones I don't like, are of course, and tragically, less. I have just started checking used, like the boards at Al Fair, and I found fair Al Fahmy wardrobe for 50 rials. I like but I am waiting for my friends to drive me out to Wadi Adai, a few places in Mutrah, and Seeb.
I am a fan of the ones from Morocco and Syria (inlaid, painted, ect). I also like dark wood ones. I am a more traditional girl, so I can't pull off those modern laquered things (which you can find at better prices here).
Unfortunately, I am picky, and everything I like costs a fortune, and some things are just waaaaay to tacky here. Pink sparkly glitter on dark wood????? WHY?!!!!!!
Most 5aleeji hairstyles involve alot of volume and hairspray (and often fake hair, yuck).
The hair raised at the crown is a usual feature, with jewels and hair accessories complimenting the style.
I like the use of hair bands.
From curly...
Too sleek...
From purposefully messy...
To refined...
Or dramatic..
...the key is always volume.
