Quote of the day: "I don't like that the man keeps coming back here!" "Habibi, he's our waiter."

MOP [aka OPNO's Omani husband] is sitting with his arms crossed angrily and his brow furrowed. To OPNO in a low, suspicious murmur, says:

"I don't like that the man keeps on coming back here."

OPNO raises her eyebrows, casually sipping her ice water as if she hadn't a care in the world about this dangerous, perverted predator stalking the couple [and in MOP's mind, mainly with eyes for his Western wife]. To her husband, drily, as if bored, dismisses him offhand with:

"Habibi, he's our waiter."

-an endearing post about the jealousies of Omani husbands

Eid Mubarak, and as always, the Shebab and their culture

Ahhhhh, my stupid firewall no longer lets me upload photos.

Belated Eid Mubarak AND National Day to all followers and stumble-upons.

So news, I have none for you, because as a good Omani girl, lol, I am rather out of the loop without my shebab's constant updates, which kinda sucks. They'll tell me if a hurricane is coming and what colour of alert the ROP is on, but other than that, they respect/fear my husband too much.

Which is kind of funny. Since he encourages me to be in the loop, as long as I talk to no one about personal things or meet face to face.

Which reminds me of a thing another Omani blogger and I were talking about, to do with our shebab pre-marriage.

We both talked about how much the guys really helped us out (the ones who just wanted to aid a sister in Islam not date her or coerrce her into marriage). How they'd give us money for little things, and we'd both be like, "I'm good. Wallah, I don't need it." And they'd be like, "take it, buy yourself some perfume." Cuz you know, any GCC girl WOULD DIE without her perfume, LOL!!!! But we girls, surrvivors that we are, can live without perfume. We wouldn't shrivel up and die without it, nor start to reek.

If we ever took the money, you'd bet we didn't buy perfume with it. Or a new crystallized cover for our laptop, lol.

Anyways, hmmm, let me think if I can think of anything else interesting to write about?

I want to do an Islamic via cultural post on abuse in Islam. But not abuse of women.

Drat! You Islam haters MUST be disapointed.

No, a post about abuse BY MOTHERS, on their children, in a society that regards mothers with the highest form of respect (higher even than husbands and fathers). I know men that have been abused by their mothers, and daughters, and in this culture, it is almost always, "under the feet of the mother is paradise". Which is true, in Islam, but that doesn't mean a child deserves to be kicked and stomped on (litterally) by an mentally disturbed Mother's feet. But I'll do that post soon.

So, on that (rather disturbing but very media-culture in tune note) I shall leave you now: to be continued.

A thing for hats... & about the Shebab ; ;, nudge, nudge

My Omani husband (aka MOP) has a thing for hats (and obviously white English-speaking women right?). I think it stems from his crush on Kate Winslet's character "Rose" from the Titanic movie. BTW, he had no idea there was a nude scene in that movie, or a sex scene, because it was of course cut out in Oman. This the closest to nude that she got: in the Oman friendly edition. Scandalous, I KNOW. LOL, believe me, the site of a wellformed ankle can hit an Omani guy off, so don't laugh about it, it is true. It is almost like wearing your underwear to the 7/11 in the USA, lol, I am serrious, a nice ankle.So Winslet's character was very idealized to MOP. He also has NO idea that I am writing about him or things he has confided to me, so if you know both of us, um, yeah, please be kind, and rewind, and forget I ever brought up the Kate Winslet thing. Anyways, I am writing this post because yesturday I saw two beautiful young expat ladies (like myself---only I was fully veiled, including my face) differentiated only in how they were dressed. One was in a skirt exposing her upper thighs but long in the back, and her midriff, and the other was wearing loose fitting linen trousers and a long T. They were both lovely, but one was dressed too sexual for an Omani grocery store. I was actually offended but the midriff exposed one, but hey, I was in a face veil, and didn't want her to think women who wear face veils are intolerant so I didn't say anything, but to be honest, there was only one man and one woman who wasn't bothered by her dressed like that. Everyone else, even the expats were going like, WTH? Al Fair isn't Rockbottom or the poolside at the Intercon. I don't creep people out in my face veil in NA, I pin pretty pins to it and flowers and wear colours to be less offensive to North Americans in my Muslim garb. And as a non Muslim expat I never showed my midrif AND inner upper thighs at the same time. It is just kind of rude. It isn't bad, but it is inconsiderate. What is pipctured below is NOT appropriate for GROCERY SHOPPING in Muscat!!!! Ahhhh, please don't give expats like me a bad rep okay? And you will, I know Omanis. And in case you don't believe good 'ole extremist me, from my very arab husband the following:

"Most Omani guys who don't understand your culture will veiw you as a peice of meat."

On from that rant a friend of mine were discussing the Shebab (Muslim Arab guys) and how sometimes the players are better than the seemingly innocent ones, because at least the players had enough game to have neverslept with a prositute. I am serrious. Guys, if this is not you, please don't be offended, but, it is the majority of guys that were my friends. They either were cool enough to have dated, or they, ugh, well, let's not go there but they er, went to Dubai & Thailand. Anyways, we came to the conclusion that all the truly innocent ones marry very young IN ORDER to avoid being in the two above categories. Which isn't the real reason a woman wants to be married to a guy but...

This post is depressing.

I love my husband, whatever category he fell into before, alhamdulilah, he is my man now;)

Cooking with the Shebab

Boxie might remember this one;p :

KH: "I cook."

OPNO: [raises one skeptical eyebrow] "You have a maid. Omani WOMEN don't even cook all that often when they have a maid."

KH: "I can make eggs with tomatoe."

OPNO and Boxie [look at eachother, like, this could be interesting]. KH continues to boil water and throws in three eggs. He boils them. He readies three paper plates. He puts one egg on each plate. He then slices a tomatoe into three chunks.

Tomatoe with eggs.

OPNO and Boxie roll their eyes at their crappy lunch with disdain.

OPNO [to KH]: "I thought you meant like an omlette with tomatoes."

Boxie: "You can't cook. You can boil water."

KH eats his crappy lunch as if it were tea at Al Bustan and smiles: "Tomatoe with egg."

MashaAllah: two things that might make people jealous but that I am going to brag about

1.) My husband is currently cooking me lunch. Yes, I married an Omani male that COOKS. And is good at it. And doesn't think cleaning my flat and cooking me lunch is anyway demasculating. Alhamdulilah. Who knows how long this will last, when he realizes I am alot more selfish and not a great cook but... for now I shall brag. From my shebab, I know that I lucked out.2.) Tomorrow I am getting paid to do something that I love. Once, I got paid to shop for clothes for myself for this job. Isn't that awesome? Tomorrow will be even better because I get paid to learn more about Oman and things people are doing to aid in making this country that I love even better. Alhamdulilah.

Omani men's veiw of Women watching sports, as well as makeup and clothing

So driving with my new husband to our camping spot, I decided that after marriage was the perfect time to start a fight. You know, just mentioning all of the things I will never ever take from Omani culture. Yeah... I know, do this BEFORE marriage. But I decided, do it while he is insanely in love with me, and yet, can't back out. Not fair, but very, very smart.

"I am not going to stop wearing colour because colour is halal in Islam, amd actually of the sunnah, not always black black black, and if you try to tell me again I have to stay in the car at the gas station unless I want to completely cover my face I am going to divorce you."

I would divorce over a lipstick. He knows this. He was forewarned that I am the most stubborn woman that he is likely ever to meet. Boxie, can confirm this fact. I am also VERY-much into Islam and the subject of hijab, and well read on it, so he can't tell me something is tabaruuj (showing off to catch men's attention with one's wealth or sexuality). Omanis (most Muslims actually) have the mistaken idea that being different or the slightest bit pretty is tabarrujj. It is not. Tabarujj is flaunting wealth, social status, or in a woman's case, sexual beauty. Not the beauty of her clothes, provided they don't make a vain show of wealth. That is rooted in evidence from Quran and hadith.

H2B [now to be known as H], while knowing I have a thing for black abayas, AND covering my face ANYWAYS, still was irrationally afraid for some reason that I'd start wearing a hot pink abaya or something in his conservative village and was actually getting annoyed with me. I let him be because I think such engagements are amusing and keep me in practice for when I actually need to use my debating skills.

H: [in a huff to OPNO] "Your head and heart is a stone."
OPNO: [not the least bit phased] "Yep, am not a clay Omani girl you can mould into whatever you want. And another thing, I am still going to wear red lipstick. Divorce me if you want. But before you talk about what is halal or not for a woman to wear in Islam..."

[Now Omani girls, please keep the following line in mind for any arguements about clothes and makeup from your-acting-all-cultural husbands]

"...why don't you grow a beard first? Huh? Focuss on correcting your own faults and bad hijab before worrying about mine."
H: "."
I won. And ladies, I usually do.

Driving some more, the issue of my love of observance of certain sports came up in the form of a question from a jealous H.
H: "So.... OPNO, what do you think of watching sports like football where men wear shorts that are too short?"
OPNO: [aware this is a trap set for her] "I think it is fine for a woman. Sports like HANDBALL, and FOOTBALL are aaaaaaaaaaaaayyyyb [shame] on the Muslim men who don't cover to their knees [Muslim men are supposed to cover all the way to their knees at all times] but no shame on a woman who keep her eye on the ball instead of staring at their shorts trying to ctach of glance of the other kind of balls."
H: [bites his lip] "So you think it is haraam for men to wear shorts but okay for women to watch men playing sports in such shorts. I don't watch women's volleyball."
OPNO: "But you watch movies don't you? You see women's boobs and uncovered heads anyway. I'd rather you watch volleyball or tennis than an add on a billboard. I am going to keep attending sporting events. Don't be jealous of the teams. I promise I am not checking them out and if I happen to be overtly attracted to a thigh or anything higher, I will lower my eyes."
H: [in a huff] "I am going to start watching women's volleyball."
OPNO: [smiling at him] "I like volleyball. We can watch it together."

Ladies, never give in on what makes you who you are unless you think that thing is actually wrong. If it IS wrong, then do make the concession, but otherwise, do not give in and up, especially early on in a marriage. Or you'll be regretting it shortly after, and you'll resent the men who made you change something about yourself that you did not think was wrong.

But DO make an allowance, while discussing, that he could be right, before you put your foot down;). Sometimes, while rarely, he is.

Omani Culture: Turn off your headlights

Apparently, it is part of H2B's Omani culture, that when driving at night, and you see a man and a woman together in a car driving towards you, you turn off your headlights, so you cannot see the man's wife. Out of respect.

Regardless of whether this results in you taking the wrong turn around some date plantations and getting exceedingly lost.

Omani Dude Driving+Girl+Ghala=traffic gridlock

I have written too many posts today already but...

Usually I have my lunch in Al Khuwair or Al Athaiba. Today I found myself stuck in Ghala WALKING with no driver. As per usual, traffic here was pretty backed up.

Some young fool in white SUV with the window rolled down in my direction wasn't making it any better.

There were some women in another SUV behind him, and Omani guys the whole stretch back.

This young fool was Omani, and thought he was all handsome and charming enough to pick a girl up in his car.

I did the ignore thing as he greeted me in Arabic. Since the traffic was so slow his driving was my walking pace, so I actually stopped walking for a bit so he'd go on ahead.

Well, he decided to stop, holding up the whole bloody line up of traffic. Saying something undoubtably smooth in Arabic to win me. Good thing I don't understand fool talk.

I was getting annoyed because people in the line up were probably blaming the resultant gridlock on me so I revealed my English identity to Fool with a wave.

"Drive on!" I hollared at him, motioning and giving my most strict look.

He started driving again at my walking pace.

If my shebab were around they'd kill you, I was thinking, remembering a sweet little blue car manned by 16 year olds hunted down by an angry Al _________ & Al __________ when B and I made the mistake of mentioning the colour and make of a car that had stalked us in MQ.

He was HAPPY to reveal that he spoke English and started chatting me up, young fool.

I cut him off drily.

"You know, I converted to Islam and I think its sick that guys like you bother a girl in a abaya more than you did when I wore short skirt. Shame on you."

He went to use the line of only wanting to help.

"Do I LOOK like someone that needs YOUR help? Young fool, I am HELPING YOU. Shame. Your mother and sister: treat me the same.

Drive on. You don't want to make me mad. Believe me, I can take care of myself, whereas if you keep bothering me, you're the one whose gonna need some help."

He opened his mouth to say something and I waved him again.

"Drive on!"

He gave up and rolled up his window. The women and three cars with Omani men drove by cheering and clapping, because apparently our exchange was loud enough for everyone on the road and in the nearby coffee shop to hear.

Usually at this coffee shop I get one or two OLD FOOLS trying to take a table next to me. Today I didn't:D

RANT: MEN AND WOMEN OF OMAN

First, I am going to complain about the women. I knew the boys first, so to their annoyances I will be loyal and recite in order.

1.) Take care of your husbands. It is an Islamic duty. That means taking care of yourself if he is to care about you. I hear the bride is on a diet to fit into her dress but after the wedding she doesn't care what she eats, if she gets fat or what not. Well she should. More so after than before marriage. Your husband wouldn't want a second wife if you took care of yourself. I have no pity on this. Most women in Oman have help from other female family members and maids if they work and have children so you can't use your children as an excuse. In Islam, a duty to raise the children with Islamic values is first, but then a duty to pleasing one's husband comes in, else the family DOES fall apart. Yes, what is on the inside counts, and counts alot. In my Western country the women care only about the outer image and their husbands leave them for Asian girls that massage and cook for them. In Oman, the men look for second wives who take care of the outide image because their first wife doesn't. There is a BALANCE ladies. Inner beauty combined with an attempt at seeking your husband's attaention and pleasure at least4 times a week is going to keep him happy. Listen to him, be interested in him, be interesting to him. Husband is going to be jealous if your wear perfume for your female visitors and shave for a wedding party but not for him. It is the sunnah and an obligation on you to make an effort, serriously.

2.) High mahers, expensive weddings, and family tribe names. These things don't equal a happy marriage or a good man so WHY are they the things you are asking for or asking/letting your family seek out for you? I know, I know, disobeying your family even for a halal or sunnah thing in Oman is the same thing as being a whore (to some) and it is the same as if you did something really wicked, but be brave. For the sake of your country, and yourselves. Change comes with one person, than your cousin, than your sister, then your children, then your country. And really, the wedding is one day. Why not invest in your future life together, ie your home, your future children's education, even a vacation for your and your husband, instead of a white wedding and hotel ballroom reservation, and expensive (and TACKY LOOKING!) kosha? Sorry. I am just very opinionated in this.

3.) Second and third wives are halal. Don't ask for divorce over this unless your husband married in secret without telling you (total disrespect and not even HALAL in most scholarly opinions unless he was unable to tell you due to him being away on a caravan for years of something rather unlikely in the age of mobile phones but whatever), or he is obviously doing it because he never loved you in the first place but was too coward to say so. Remind him second wives in Islam are not just pretty young things though, but women in general need. WIDOWED DIVORCED WOMEN NO OTHER MEN WOULD MARRY WITH CHIDLREN TO SUPPORT OR ORPHANS WITH NO FAMILIES. Do not turn these women away. In Islam, they are to be cared for, by you, as well as your husband. Want for others what you want for yourselves.

4.) If you are a widowed of divorced woman, one of the reasons men don't want divorced or widowed women is because they are afraidf they won't add up to another man. Yes, true. So don't compare, ever. Just some advice.

Not, to the men, my brothers, my friends:

1.) You can't only complain about the women of Oman. What the hell are you doing out all night at the shisha bars or hanging with your friends when you have a wife and kids at home? Once in a while is fine, on a schedule, you go out twice during the week, and one or two weekends a month with the guys. The rest should be for your family. Your wife isn't just for sex and making babies and following kids around. You got to spend time with her. The kids are yours too and need time with their father. Nothing makes me disrespect you more.

2.) BE A MAN. You don't love your cousin that your family wants you to marry? DON'T MARRY HER IN THE FIRST PLACE! Islam says you can say no. It is your right. If you marry her, and then want to marry another girl because you don't love her but are afraid she won't be able to remarry if your divorce her (why were you so selfish and cowardly to do that in the first place to her) it is hard to pity you. You were a coward. Face up. Be brave in the first place. Don't put a girl in that position, ever.

3.) If you are going to marry another wife, try to consider how your wife will emotionally handle it. Do you both barely have enough money and time for eachother as is? Then you can't do it fairly can you, and then Islam forbids you.

4.) Also when it comes to marriage, if you had sex before marriage, don't marry a virgin, marry a woman of your like. I am serrious. The Qu'ran is pretty clear on that. The pure are for the pure.

5.) Unto the pure are for the pure and the good the good... Widowed and divorced woman in Islam are as good as a VIRGIN!!!! They are considered PURE. Yes, yes they ARE, no matter how screwed up culture is, one that says a man that sleeps around but that has never marrie dis better for him to marry a virgin than a good and pure divorced lady with taqwa, ya Allah!

A Shebab-less OPNO? Oh NO! And cheating, from the male Omani perspective

I have alot of Omani guy friends. Correct that. Had. Sweetness of Salalah will be proud of me, but I have gone back to my Islamic self (with the exeption of still listening to music) and that means I have bid adieu to my shebab (the guys I knew before and after Islam here in Oman). Most of them totally understood and respected the decision, especially on the last note no Omani guy can argue with:

"I want to be a good muslimah like your sisters in Oman."

Even if his sister is a total you-know-whatever he'll never argue this point on you.

Anyways, I'll still get my newsfeed from them, [and yes B aka L I changed my GSM because a new life requires new fittings and that international text message was from Princess] because two have guessed OPNO's identity. WHO KNEW YOU READ ENGLISH A & Y!!!!!!!!!!!! AM soooooooooooooooo proud of YOU!!!!!! A, much love. Your kind words of encouragement meant the world to me. And Y, of course, if you want your CD back, you can come visit for that at least once more. I kinda forgot to give it back to you. And now you don't know my phone number:( M: you know what you meant. I wish you the best.

I still of course, also get to relate the many entertaining cultural bits we exchanged over the years, me and my shebab.

One was four different Omani guys (all of which I love more than breath) and their takes on cheating. Here goes:

1.) KH and L and I were discussing cheating. L is like Princess (maybe she is an OPNO too??????) and KH is an Omani guy who I'd die for. Yes, really I would. WHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHYYY?!!!! All the Omani shebab of Ras Al Hamra wonder? That is for OPNO to know, but he was her bestfriend.

L and OPNO asked KH what he'd do if he ever caught his wife cheating or in love with another man. If she was just in love with another man, his first instinct would be to make get the other man the only way he could, through her, managing her body and her life. OPNO reminds him this wouldn't fix things. He knows that, is just what he'd do. If his wife physically committed adultery and left him for another fool? He'd let her go. The two girls nodded, thinking how far from their expectation of his countenance this would be.

But this last part left L and OPNO with their mouths agape.

KH: "But if she ever tried to come back to me I'd kill her with my own hands."

2.) There was an Omani girl the boys all went to school with India. She had a boyfriend. Everyone knew it, except her cousin back home she'd marry. Before the wedding she had hymen repair surgery, married the guy, and then went right back to her boyfriend. She got pregnant NOT by her husband. The kid looks nothing like the husband but none of our shebab (who know) have the heart to tell the guy because he loves the girl completely and thinks she was only ever his. Better not to know is the mass consensus.

3.) One of the guys I counted as the bestest of the best of the Omani guys I know (still do, I prefer to think the best;) ) he's given up on marriage, because one fiance played him for a fool. Now he takes every girl as maybe cheating on something or another, even if she loves him with every breath of her being.

4.) One Omani man from Al Batinah, he loved a girl. Proposed to her after two conversations, went against his family... he loved her that much. Realizing how much he'd have to sacrifice for her, she decided to break away, because she loved him. The only way to do this was to have a secret from him so terrible she'd never be able to tell him or marry him bearing the burden of it in silence. She she decided to sleep with another man. But the Omani man from Al Batinah, he came to her home the night she was with the other man, and heard her making love to the other man. He saw and heard her with another. Yet, to this day, he loves her, and forgave her, and they are married now. Like KH though, his first reaction was the same. She was pregnant within the first month of marriage.

To all my Omani male readers: what would you do, what is your opinion, since, cheating [it IS] so prevalent in Muscat?

WARNING: SEMANTICS mean something in Relationships in Oman

FOR ALL MY EXPAT GIRLS AND OMANI GFs:

If you are a girl, and you are afraid of getting hurt in love and you describe being hurt in love like falling and getting your body torn up on the rocks, and you ask your Omani dude (potential love of your life to be???), "hey is it safe to fall? Because I don't want to hit rockbottom [not the nightspot]?" And he says, "You can fly." It means he damn well does intend to drop you. But you are a big girl, and can catch yourself.

And you know what, girl, you DO have wings. YOU CAN FLY.

FLY AWAY FROM THIS DUDE BEFORE YOUR GET YOUR BODY BROKEN ON THE GLASS WINDOW IN FRONT OF HIS HEART YOU ARE GOING TO SMASH INTO EVENETUALLY!!!!!!!

Watch out. Semantics are important in relationships in Oman. And Omani guys rarely differentiate between friendship combined with lust as love, and love as in I want you with me for the rest of my life and I can never be with anyone else kind of love until it is near over (unless they propose first and make good on acting that out).

It's Eid Time, Polish Your Khanjar! You're Going to be Visiting Grandpa!

Most of my guy friends their grandfather's are HIGHLY disapointed the way the Omani youth of today have let things slip. GONE, gone GONE are the days when you would never catch a lad out of his dishdasha (even while ice skating in Al Kuwair for the first time:D).

Even in conservative villages where all white disdasha and izhar (male undergarment) are de rigeur you will still have people's grandfather's bemoaning the fact that in the old days a man never left home without his khanjar (the omani dagger). And I quote: "Even if he was poor he'd at least stick a knife through his belt to try and look presentable." And of course you need your assa (walking stick/camel stick), and maybe bullet belts criss-crossed across your chest and a rifle.

Most of my friends (not the ones who were Imam's sons of course: M excluding MA) are more into hip hop t-shirts and bling bling watches, and Thai sneaks, and boarder shorts (we are THAT generation after all). But for Eid, AND WEDDINGS, they sport khanjar and bisht and sometimes even assa. To me, it is funny to see, since some of them look foriegn to me in a Kuma.

Since I like to be Miss Sharqiya Village Girl, or Muscati beach brat in abaya and trendy shayla, that is like THEM seeing me dressed in Western clothes.

Funny what we take as our culture.

Eid Mubarak in advance all. Boys, polish your khanjars, girls, get your henna on.

Omani Men's Traditional Dress: the Omani Dishdasha

Of course, white remains the most popular dishdasha colour for Omani men, being that the Prophet Mohamed SAW loved that particular colour, but Oman is famous for having very colourful regional garments and that goes for the men as well as the women, and not only the headgear of Omani men varies in design and shade.Beige dishdashas... Cream dishdasha...
Orange dishdasha (worn by the Sultan)...
Sorbet orange dishdasha in Nizwa...

Mauve/pinky dishdasha (hemmed very short)...

Maroon dishdasha...
Lilac dishdasha...

Smoke grey dishdasha...to turquoise.Navy blue dishdasha...

Indigo blule dishdasha...

Baby blue disdasha...

Mint green disdasha...

And olive green dishdasha with flowers (I saved the brightest, most original for last;) ).

There are even black dishdashaa, and pink ones (dear God, the FOOL that tried to hit on me at the airport yesturday was wearing a white dishdasha tailored off with hot pink threads and matching Barbie pink kuma---lol).

The dishdasha is a robe hemmed anywhere from ground length to the mid shin, available in a array of colours (usually cotton fabric). It is distinguished by the short tassel at the neck (which can be perfumed [long rope-like tassels are for UAE or Oman/Bahraimi area]). The threading edging the neck-close and the sleeves might be courdinated to match the man's kuma (hat).

Omani Kumas---how they are made

If you live in Oman there is no way you failed to notice the colourful pill-box style hats Omani wear. What you MAY not have noticed, is the majority sold in the shops are made by machine, not by traditional methods: hand embroidery. A machine made kuma can be bought for 2 OMR-16 OMR, whereas a handmade gem can be sold for 30-60 OMR. As, when I have children, AND marry lol, I intend to work more partime, I'd like something I could do for extra income, and if I'm good at this, I'll try my luck at kumas. A kuma generally takes 2 months to one year to complete, depending on your skill. Though some women manage to make 2-3 a month. I don't KNOW how, lol.

I have been lucky enough to have been taught how to do so by my friend R's mother, who seemed very excited I wanted to make kumas. In case you want to learn this art or know about it but don't have the assistance of R's Mum to do so, this post is great http://dailydoseofme.wordpress.com/2008/11/29/kumma-tutorial-omani-cap/#comment-733. [where I stole most of my pics from except the blurry one above which is mine from Muscat Days].To make a kuma you will need the base and the round of cap. These can be purchased from any of the men's tailoring shops, and I got mine in Mutrah (as I am a Mutrah girl). Shops all over from Al Harthy complex & Saabco sell them. You also need two bobbins of thread (more than one colour if you like), sewing needles, and scissors for cutting the thread. The design is pre-stitched and your goal is to fill in the blanks with circle embroidery. Above pic of pre-designed kuma, sans embroidery.
Above pic of filled in design. Note the circle style embroidery called najim, which basically means 'star'. "You can see the star is what is used to fill the empty spaces which creates the design. The objective is to start and end at the same point to form a circle. The hole in the circle is formed by piercing the same hole everytime and pulling."-Daily Dose of Me . This sewing technique is called 'tanjeem'.

To make a circle/star, start off by threading the needle, and start from a corner and make a hole in the middle (which will eventually be the centre of the najim).You keep repeating the same thing, while rotating the cap and ALWAYS making sure when stiching that the thread is always held taught to the left, like so... This is how it should look, the circle is starting to form.

Still rotating and always using the same starting point (the hole) to continue the circle the pic below is half a cirle, nus najima which is another style used. As it takes half the space of the nijma (circle) then that means double the work which means more labour in turn its more costs more.

Back to the starting point...

...one tanjeem is done. Voila! Your Omani kuma. Only x #s more najma to do! hehehe.
The handmade ones are very popular to order for Eid, like 2 a year, or for women to make as gifts for special occasions.

"You have face like Omani!"

In a government office the other day a woman wearing a gashwa (Emirati face veil with no slit for the eyes) was speaking to me in Arabic. Her accent was slightly Beduoin/Sharqiyah-ish so I had a hard time understanding. When she realized after we struggled a bit that I was English not Omani she explained to me I had a face "like Omani." Men often exclaim this, saying "You have face like Omani!" but I assumed this was a chance to talk to me, a foreign woman. But I suppose it is truly meant? If they indeed mean like the man pictured above, could be.

Only my nose is different, and I am paler: but he could be my 'more-outdoorsy' big brother???
I remember a taxi driver from Al Sharqiyah said to me "same, same, eyes, you/me." And I laughed because his next sentance was "we marry?"

There is a place in Sharquiyah (not naming it hehehe, because it is my personal vacation spot) where I fit right in other than my lack of a good Sharqiyah accent and fluency in Arabic. There: the women dress in cotten jalabiyia and warqiyah like I do-- of bright colours, and they look like me, talk to men without fear the same way I do on subjects that are halal for Muslims to contact one another with, dance modestly sometimes, swim in the wadis like I do.... It is really, along with the natural beauty there, a place where it seems I should have been born.

I never looked like anyone else in my family too much other than expression-wise, and the town where I grew up was unlike the wadi I dreamed of as a child, with emerald waters shaded by date palms, riding horses, chasing goats (did I mention that I have a natural affinity with camels and goats and donkeys LOL?-I do, mashaAllah;) ) and people whose values and ideas of God/Allah are similiar to my own.

We are Sunni [people in the willayat I am fond of], but not strict in the way of Saudi Arabia. We like to learn from other religious sects of our Islam and our friends who are Muslims are Muslims to us regardless their differences in practice from our own. Gender segregation exists situationally, not societially [I can make up words!]. Maybe I am idealizing. But I found my home in Oman. In a little village in Sharqiyah nearby a wadi somewhere;p.

Funny, it was always my little sister who looked Arab. She could pass as Saudi, all it took was a black shayla scarf wrapped just so. Me, I was always the "non-Muslim" looking one lol.

But sometimes I suppose, I "have face like Omani." At least some Omanis seem to think so.

Quote of the day, and ooooookay, so TOMORROW is Ramadan (probaby)

Last night I accomplished most of my Ramadaan chore goals unrelated to religious thinking. I even determined my Eid dress [silk Dhofari father-of-the-tail dress in yellow floral silk by Valentino with simple delicate beading and no over-embellishment] and plain burnt orange Dior silk sirwaal pants that match the floral pattern in the yellow dress [the flowers are purple and orange and blue] that I shall handbead with round crystals surrounded by small coral and turquoise seed beads. I like to sew. It is a fun hobby.

So tomorrow will be Ramadaan most likely. I am SOOOOOO excited. I will give you the following funny Ramadaan story, after complaining about some of the Saudi guys in her city and their funny attempts to hide the fact that they weren't fasting by running away from their fastfood in the malls.

MF [ruefully admits]: "I used to make my Christian girlfriend fast in the US."

OPNO: "." [OPNO wonders at MF trying to teach a girl he was dating about Islam]

MF [gives a sad embarrassed smile]: "...She'd be fasting... and I'd be sitting there smoking and eating."

OPNO: [laughs]. "Ohhhhhhh MF. Haraam." [Laughs out loud some more, but is happy MF acknowledges this sad mistake and aims for better.]

Skinny Jeans for Omani Men, just 1 small pointer

To the men of Oman (dear friends, brothers, cousins, fans): If your legs are skinnier than a girl's (ie if your legs are the size of a regular man's arm from the elbow down) DO NOT go for skinny jeans. Is just NOT a good look for you.

I apologize to all the ROP motorcycle cops with arms for legs, we know you had no say in the matter.

For Omani Guys: How NOT to PROPOSE to a girl part 1

Dear Guys,

While your attentions have been flattering (generally not, I am being nice), you SUCK at proposing to a modern (but still traditional girl). I am writing this post because I FINALLY RECIEVED A FEW DECENT proposals, lol, but that is for the daily diary not, here. This post will be about the hilariously BAD marriage lines I have been given over the years, me and my friends.

I have recieved MANY proposals of marriage since I moved to Oman, and these are combined with my friends' experiences. They often begin the same way. Here is how NOT to propose to a girl, from most common, to least common:

Beginning of BAD marriage proposal #1: "I have a house."

'Uh, ok, so do I.'

Stating that you have a house is great and all, we women love a man who lives on his own and can take care of himself and isn't living off his parents. But this is marriage AND OUR futures you are talking about. This is a detail we'll want to know about later, sure, but stating it first is like saying all we women care about when we are marrying you is getting out of our father's houses and having a roof over our heads. Generally speaking, most girls don't like to be thought of as that miskeen. LOL, and I have BEEN the definition of independent 'miskeen' for a long time now. We want to know why you want to marry us, and THEN what you can do for us. If a girl is only interested in what you can do for her, um, she's GENERALLY marrying you for the wrong reasons.

BAD marriage proposal #2: The marriage proposal so far has gone great. You like the guy, he has what you are looking for. Then he reveals what a backwards tool he is by finishing arrogantly, "You should consider it soon. You are not that young anymore.... Men don't like to marry women after 25."

'Uh! So if I was a little bit older (you would be too, you jerk!) you wouldn't consider me? women expire like milk! Oh so KIND of your offer now, tool.'

Too bad when I FIRST heard this line I was SIXTEEN years old! And many years have past and I am still getting offers.' LOL:XD

We women certainly do not like for you to imply that our inherent value to you is embued with our age which is something that will CHANGE. We went to be seen as having PERSONALITIES, ideas, and then after you appreciate that, individual physical features. We are looking for someone to enoy spending our lives with. Not someone who makes himself seem small-minded and incompatible with these basic emotional needs a woman HAS.

Bad marriage proposal #3: similiar to bad proposal #2, saying your reason for marrying is because we are "beautiful" and "fair" or because our "family is important" makes us feel you are marrying us to USE us for your own upping of social status, not because you ACTUALLY value us. And maybe you do, but just can't communicate it???????In my case, bad marriage proposal #4: Guy really doesn't try to list any of his merits. He just opens with "I will give you an Omani passport." I look at him like, what an idiot.

I came here on my own. Arab guys from non-Gulf countries are ALWAYS trying to marry me for MY passport. I love Oman and don't need an Omani passport to feel like I can do something for this country, that I am part of the landscape and culture, LOL. I love Oman. And the culture. Doesn't mean AT ALL that I will marry ANY OMANI MALE that asks me LOL:XD ;p

Ahhhhhhh, hehehehe.

Funny/really DUMB reasons Omani guys have given the women of OPNO for their proposals:

"Your nose is nice."

"I like way yu talk."

"The maher for baby girls in my family will be good because you are so white."

"I cannot afford to marry Omani girl."

"You wear abaya." And MUST thus be a good Muslim right???? Uh, ASK ABOUT THE RELIGIOUS opinions of the woman, don't just assum her religion is spot on cuz she has a scarf on her head. Makes you look like the FACADE of religion is all you care about, not the real core of the person's values.

That's about it for now.